Have you ever set out on a new project – something you know you have the skills to do? You might not exactly know the specifics of every little step along the way – but in assessing the overall project and requirements: you see you’ve got what it takes to move this point and create it. Clear as day: you can do this.
But then… when you actually start walking the point, things start changing. Suddenly starting to feel a bit apprehensive and not quite sure, starting to doubt yourself, experiencing all kinds of resistances, procrastinating on simple steps, comparing yourself to others doing similar projects and thinking you’re not as good as them or your skills aren’t as developed as theirs. The slightest thought can lead you to go into a total experience of despondence and suddenly you can’t see the forest through the trees.
So – how does that work – how can you go from knowing that you can do something – to feeling like you’re at a total loss in relation to it? It’s kind of similar to the difference between clear skies and stormy weather.
Beforehand – you had clear skies – you were able to see and assess practically what it would take and could clearly see that: you can do it, you have it in you. You can see the path laid out in front of you and you start walking it. But then – clouds come in, it starts raining, pouring, it’s cold and you feel miserable and you start looking out for the nearest pub to go into and have a nice cup of hot chocolate, leaving this ‘wretched path’ behind you.
The storm moving in is of course an analogy for your own emotions. The path is still there, the knowing you can walk it is actually also still there – but everything FEELS so hard, your MOOD is influencing what you see, how you perceive and experience yourself and it complicates EVERYTHING.
Here also – you have the difference between Seeing the Potential and actually Walking it into Creation. Where – seeing what is possible is one thing – but in actually walking it, all kinds of personalities, fears, ideas, judgments etc can be triggered in the blink of an eye – and so walking a particular path is not only going to entail the physical process you saw you can handle – there’s going to be the internal path you need to walk as well. I’ve found that being able to distinguish between the two: the physical path and the internal path is quite crucial.
Physically/practically, there may be certain skills you’ll need to hone, points to specify and develop, hurdles to overcome – but you know within yourself that you can do that so long as you keep moving yourself to find solutions and put in the effort. And so, when you experience yourself as heavy, frustrated, hopeless, powerless – you realize that those are INTERNAL emotional experiences, which you can tackle with your self-supportive tools of writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective statements and application. It’s when you allow yourself to make conclusions about the physical, practical process BASED ON your internal experience that things really go hay-wire.
When you don’t see the difference between the two dimensions as the internal and the external path so to speak, it becomes more difficult to direct yourself in either one.
So – just a perspective to keep in mind to assist you when you’re faced with such an experience – to in those moments clarify for yourself: This is where I’m at on my practical external path and this is the next step to take here – and This is where I’m at on my internal path, and what I need to do to direct this experience, is that. And so – always ensuring that you see the difference between your practical physical walking and your internal mind process so that you can direct yourself in each one effectively and appropriately.